Rabies might be an STD

The BackBlast:

Rube has been pushing paper at BofA so long that they gave him two months off this summer. For some reason, he decided it would be a good idea to spend this time in various third world countries and also to bring his young kids with him. In his absence, apparently Scrooge was left to do his bidding by lining up Q’s for BHM, which I honestly thought had died a slow death, like PWW and everything else Cindy touches (RIP Caddyshack).

Speaking of Scrooge, he has been bugging me all day about this damn backblast. Yet another thing I thought had died a slow death. But alas, we don’t all live the coddled life of a male realtor like Scrooge and L10, so here I am at 9pm.

What we did:

We ran to the base of the lurker. We did suicides up and down the lurker. We did some other exercises near the base of the lurker. We were supposed to run over to Mega Toole and repeat, but we had a few flesh anchors that made that difficult, so instead we did a hot lap around the lake, a few more exercises, then ran home. 3.65 miles – very disappointing. Was expecting a 4 handle. I don’t think BHM had seen anything starting with a 4 since 2023 based on the sorry ass strava’s I see every week.

Why the fuck is this called moleskin:

– There were 5 people at this workout I had never seen before. 5. I think most of them were young enough to be H.E.’s kids. I guess the recruiting young boys thing Redd Foxx was pushing a few years ago is finally paying off.
– We had an FNG named Lloyd Christmas or something. We named him McFly. I think he has the unfortunate privilege of working with Stogie.
– Rube’s wife got rabies from a wild monkey in Thailand. TBD on if rabies can be transmitted sexually or if Rube just doesn’t get any anymore.
– Apparently Tassels is the only person that doesn’t know rabies has a 100% death rate. Very fitting for someone that loves to discuss how we can say “retard” again and also went to the #1 college for innovation
– Slice has become a caricature of himself – waking up neighbors as he yells about the best place to buy authentic prosciutto in Charlotte
– I’ve met Thruster many times, though I had no idea his name was Thruster or how I actually know him. He’s one of those guys you see for years at random places and just say hi, but neither of you really know if you met at work, or a bar, or a kids birthday party. It was good to see you.
– Apparently Holtz is back from his 5 year hiatus. I think the last time I saw him he made us sprint to Bone Saw and back at PWW (before Cindy ran it into the ground), which really pissed off Dredd but was also hilarious. Now he just drinks coffee on frogger’s porch and watches me walk my dogs like a creeper.
– Stogie asked for a jailbreak no less than 5 times, then preceded to be DFL once it started
– I think Slaughter and Scrooge are the only people in metro that still do their “thing”
– I got nothing for HE, TML or Mr Bo. They just do their thing and observe the chaos like a disappointed father watching their son become a vegan.

…I think I picked all the meat off that bone…