Things You Never Thought You’d Hear Marbles Say for $800

The BackBlast:

Seven made it out for a quick tour through Dilworth and the Pearl District with a little game of knockout in the middle to keep things interesting.

Main Event:
– Get on the greenway toward toward the hospital
– Get off the greenway and cut back up the hill behind the new section of CMC toward Scott Ave (merkins along the way)
– Cross over Scott and take Buchanan down to St. Pats (dips to collect the Pax)
– Take Dilworth Road to Morehead (more merkins and LBCs to collect the Pax)
– Get on McDowell toward Uptown (Pax begin to wonder if YHC is crazy enough to go to the Muthaship…wasn’t in the cards today)
– Cut in to the Pearl District and head over to Pearl Park basketball courts for a quick game of knockout. Honestly didn’t expect to win so easily.
– Continue down Pearl Park Way, cross over Kenilworth and back on the greenway to COT
– All in ~ 4 miles, good diet of merkins, dips, LBCs, and one game of knockout to top it off

Naked Moleskin:
Inspiration for this morning’s workout came from a Sunday morning run on the same path. After seeing the basketball court at Pearl Park, it instantly clicked – we would go full WNBA theme with a game of knockout and winner gets a special “green” present. Problem was, between Sunday morning and Tuesday night, YHC never made it Adam & Eve to secure the green winner’s present. So instead, the first loser (Marbles) received a warm Wicked Weed Pernicious that was sitting on the counter this morning.

Good crew out there, relatively speaking. The average age was probably 52. #respect

Marbles (War Daddy), the site Q and unofficial forest surgeon, kept things tight this week—no secret yard cut-throughs, no shortcuts, just pain. He may need surgery to rebalance his body after a hernia tried to rearrange his internal architecture. First one out in Knockout, but somehow walked away with a Wicked Weed Pernicious—which he didn’t even crush before leaving. Also, his last backblast was so bad it might be studied in future Q school as a cautionary tale. But hey, he’s still the glue holding this circus together.

Clipboard showed up like a human checklist: focused, efficient, and absolutely allergic to nonsense. While others were still trying to remember how to tie their shoes, Clipboard was halfway through his second set of pushups, probably calculating reps in Excel format. No flair, no fluff—just pure, unfiltered hustle.
Doobie was unusually quiet today. Not mysterious quiet—more like “I’m trying not to pass out” quiet. Rumor has it he was sucking wind so hard, nearby trees started leaning toward him for carbon dioxide. Still, he kept moving. YHC did expect a little more out Doobie in Knockout, but maybe it was the lack of oxygen.

KGB was out front like he was chasing secrets—or maybe just trying to outrun the rest of you before disappearing for the last five minutes. Classic spy move: dominate the mission, then vanish before cleanup. If you didn’t know better, you’d think he had a helicopter extraction waiting at the greenway.

Oswald was the unsung hero, the flesh anchor holding down the rear like a champ. No breaks, no complaints, just steady suffering with a side of grit. If the workout were a war movie, Oswald would be the guy dragging the wounded to safety while still firing pushups from the trenches.

T-Bag (War Baby) is clearly on a post-honeymoon high, Q’ing workouts like he’s trying to earn a merit badge in marital fitness. He launched a basketball into the greenway like it was a tribute to the gods of cardio, and thankfully Marbles the arborist stepped in like a woodland wizard, tearing down a branch to retrieve it.

YHC took us out.

Thrust